on the street, bad manbag decisions

Two things on the way to work this morning were quite bothersome.

1.) This man wearing a SWAGbag. (No, not swagger, but S.W.A.G. as in “Stuff We All Get,” like at a conference or event). This bag is in no way a respectable manbag.

I couldn’t tell you exactly what that horrible logo is.. but it looks like a pink pokemon creature with sharp teeth and a tail.  Between the huge, hot pink emblem and the fact that its looks like a cheap, complimentary canvas black messanger bag that could barely fit a 5-subject notebook… it’s fair game to say that this really isn’t a “value-adding” mancessory.  Actually, the logo alone is enough to make this not a mancessory at all.

Upon searching the internet for the company of origin of this hideous mascot (almost as bad as Quizno’s little rat creatures).. I’ve come up with this:

THIS, was printed on the bag a 25 year old man wore to work today. Come on, man, really? Your little sister probably really hates you right now.

2.) I hate this so much, that you must pardon me, really. Because, now, I’ve taken this personally:

Ahh, it kills me everytime.  Look at the shoulders of the jacket–wrinkling and losing intergrity with every survivorman-esque step. I mean, honestly, I could tear apart the boxed-shirt/tie combo this guy was wearing (spotted those little triangle patterns that alternate colors ever 2 inches and looked screen printed onto a flimsy textile of sorts), or I could say his jacket was too long and looked like it belonged to his father… but I won’t. No need to poke fun, as the L.L.Bean slung over his shoulders already makes it clear– He does not know better.

5 Responses to “on the street, bad manbag decisions”
  1. classyfabulous says:

    this is absolutely hilarious (and also very sad). nice catch though, in both cases!

  2. Leah says:

    Perhaps the first swag bag is being worn ironically? If so, is this acceptable?

    The people DEMAND an answer!

  3. manshion says:

    Answer’s simple:

    Fashion irony (a future post) can only occur when:

    The Wearer has a mastery of the outfit.

    The Wearer has otherwise shown a general outfit-theme. Said theme will act as the foil for the ironic element, thus making it obvious that the Wearer has made a conscious decision.

    In reply to this particular Ace’s consolation-gift sporting… it was very, very obvious he had no idea what the fuck he was doing today.

    I would have perhaps given him a pat on the back, a manshion business card, and a little “talking-to” …but then I’d run the risk of looking like I knew him. The 25-year old grandma’s boy with the Pikachu bag. So. Sorry guy.

    -The Editor

  4. Lol…definitely know people and see it all the time. The one that gets me the most is the over sized backpack. Because often it is a little man wearing the big book bag. Then to take it a step further, he is wearing a suit. Just as you practically said, my heart cringes as I picture the suit (which is probably cheap, but we’ll pretend it isn’t) is getting compromised under the crappy straps of the over sized backpack.

    NOTE: If you ever do the over size backpack with a suit, which I hope no of you do since you read the blog…at least jazz it up with a one armed hold, DO NOT wear it properly for full body support!

  5. Ty says:

    I think the pink pikachu bag is hilarious. I’d like to meet the guy — I bet he has a killer sense of humor.

    Don’t know why you found it so distasteful to be (obviously) intentionally goofy.

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